Today, while scrolling through Facebook I came across an article (posted below) from a mom who's daughter was diagnosed two years ago with half a heart. The article goes into if she would go back to the day they got the diagnosis what she would tell herself.
As I read through it I couldn't help but think all those things she was saying, and know exactly what she means. I still think and say how I wanna go back to the day before we got the call about her heart. When everything was normal, and perfect (to us) when she was healthy and not sick (we thought) and not looking at surgeries and fighting for her life. Back before I cried almost daily and when getting ready for her arrival wasn't so scary.
Just over a week ago we were in a hospital having another ultrasound and as the tech was taking the photos of our precious little girls heart I couldn't fight back the tears as they welled up in my eyes because I knew that little girl would be fighting for her life in just a few short months. As the tech moved onto to capturing her little hands and feet, then to her face and catching her little wiggles I smiled and reminded myself as hard as all of this is, she is still here, and we still have our little girl. That that face on the screen is our beautiful little girl and she is going to make it, she is going to be the fighter that pulls through this, she is going to take those kicks and punches I feel daily in my belly and one day use those while she kicks a ball in the yard with Wyatt, and use those hands to play with her toys and help me make cookies in the kitchen. As hard as it is to think of anything else right now except what we have been dealt we have to remember she is still our baby, she will just have a few bumps in the road we have to go over before we can get there!
As hard as it is for me to process how I am going to be there for her in the hospital and still be there for Wyatt without loosing our time together the article reminded me it will work out and he is going to be okay too. He is going to understand and know he is just still just as loved as before.
She reminded me that as hard as these last few weeks have been adding not having support from people we thought we would have support from, (que Tracy Lawrence- Find out who your friends are) lets us know they aren't worth the time and that we have had and continue to have amazing support and have meet some new people that have helped us in ways we never thought we needed and we are so thankful for them!
I try to remind myself of these things but it's so easy to get lost in the bad, the research, the stories, so articles like these help bring you back to the good in this whole situation.
Most of all outside of the article I am reminded that god is in control and we just need to trust him and he will get us through. Going back to the day before our world changed isn't an option, but we're going to be okay and make it through, we are going to have many hard times to come, but those good times will out way the bad every time, every milestone will be that much more special, and more to celebrate.
I try to remind myself of these things but it's so easy to get lost in the bad, the research, the stories, so articles like these help bring you back to the good in this whole situation.
Most of all outside of the article I am reminded that god is in control and we just need to trust him and he will get us through. Going back to the day before our world changed isn't an option, but we're going to be okay and make it through, we are going to have many hard times to come, but those good times will out way the bad every time, every milestone will be that much more special, and more to celebrate.
http://themighty.com/2015/10/to-the-mom-who-just-f0und-out-her-baby-has-half-a-heart/
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