I am packing away clothes and blankets that I dreamed of her wearing, that just a couple short months ago I washed and got all ready for her.
As I put them away I can only imagine how cute and adorable she would have looked in them all because those are the only visions I have.
I don't get to have the memories of the times she wore them or the milestones that were met in them like I did when I packed away Wyatt's.
My heart breaks for the things we never get with Paisley.
The other night I stumbled across this, 
This silly, hyper, loving, amazing little boy right here will. This little man who keeps me going and brings a smile to my face in the midst of tears. Who says exactly what I need to hear exactly when I need to hear it.
And it is so perfectly said. We lost it all. We will never have those glorious moments with our sweet Paisley-Ann.
Wyatt will never get to "teach sissy to swim in the tub" "swinging with sissy" and all the other things he said he wanted to do with her as we prepared him to become a big brother.
Right now I'm stuck at the road of putting all these things away breaks me because it is accepting that she will never wear them. But leaving them out is painful reminder knowing I never got to put them on her.
Psalm 34:18 The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
How do I move forward. I know the pain will never go away but I pray over time it will lessen and I can feel somewhat normal again.
Romans 8:18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
I will keep striving to that day. I will keep going, trying to reach a day of "normal" again, I will hold onto the glory of one day seeing gods face, our family being together again, and holding my baby girl in my arms once more.
What's going to keep me moving to that day?!
Gods word, faithfulness and this.
So tonight (and every night) hold your babies close, rock them to sleep when they ask, make time for that "one more book," and be there with them. So many people all over the world would give anything to be able to do those things with a baby and or child they lost.
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